Anger needs to be expressed

by | Apr 15, 2020 | 0 comments

Anger, can be good servant if we know how express it

Anger has been for long time understood as something toxic, something disturbing that we need to eliminate, a stage to work through and most of us are use to experience the suppressed anger. Maybe you know feelings of frustration, worthlessness and sensation of the tension in the body. 

Suppressed anger and sexuality

How does it feels? Feeling constant tension in the body especially in jaw and shoulders or even become numb. No surprise to feel tired, exhausted, frustrated and when you would like to feel better, even shame can be present. It is very hard to enjoy sex and intimate connection with partner or start dating and look for possible partner. Suppressed anger in our body can be seen as big blog that takes most of energy, so there is hardly any left for feeling good and joyful.

Through my therapy work and my own experience I sadly realised, how we are scared to express anger, having fear of “let the dragon out of the cave”, especially people who had experienced any kind of abuse or trauma in early times of their life. How to deal with it, it feels scary, uncomfortable, dangerous, not allowed. But how important it is to get your power back and speak your truth. That is one important topic we work on together in your psychosexual therapy process.

We are told to forgive and love and nobody really tell us what to do with that energy that has been suppressed and interfering our life for so long. There is way and it is never too late. I do not talk about being violent or destructive. I invite my client to safely look in to their believes and messages they got about anger in their childhood and gently meeting anger in our somatic expression, in your body. 

What if I tell you anger can be your great friend and servant if you learn how to meet that emotion in your body and how to bring awareness about your anger. That is big part of Psychosexual Therapy, where I understand anger as source of energy. When we start to feel, even uncomfortable feelings and emotions comes, we are on the way to heal and feel better. Yes it is process and not all the time it feels comfortable and easy. I find it as kind of alchemy where you lear how to meet and transform your sensation, feelings, emotions and thought to serve you to bring magic into your life.

Written By Barbora

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